05:33:13
I was hoping for a 4 hour something time, but I smashed my 2014 prognosis just by crossing the start line. To get over the finish line, no matter how slowly, is pretty good. Illness during training meant I only got up to 15 miles (and they were run/walk) so I was very pleasantly surprised how easy the first half was. I started struggling at mile 14 and pushed through until mile 19 where I needed to stop for a sit down and a freeze pop. Until mile 19 the smiles had been genuine, but after that point I really had to work at it and kept mentally re-reading the sports psychology articles I read about smile-induced dopamine hits (I’m pretty sure that was a fair substitute for actual training). I’m absolutely certain it was this mental preparation which got me round, helped by the people who came to cheer me on. I watched the BBC ‘Finish Line’ stream, and saw myself a) confirm with a bloke called Phil that we’d just crossed the actual finish line and there was no more running to do, and b) high-five him.
I thought I’d feel different after doing it, physically and mentally. I had very real expectations of physical pain but - whilst I didn’t expect it to hit me the second I stopped - 11 blisters, a bra related friction burn and some unfortunate buttock chaffing wasn’t as bad as it could have been. I also thought I’d feel elated and on top of the world (instead I just felt knackered and thirsty) because running a marathon would be the hardest thing I’d done in my life but it absolutely wasn’t - the physical and psychological recovery from transverse myelitis was 100% more difficult. But that in itself is a massive reason to be happy: it’s a 33%/33%/33% split of people with transverse myelitis who will make a good recovery/some recovery/no recovery, and of the 33% who make a ‘good’ recovery I don’t know the percentage who will go on to run a marathon but I bet it’s not many.
Love Emily x
